You made the decision to start therapy, and you have a few therapists in mind. Maybe you looked at their websites, checked them out on social media, or talked to them on the phone. How do you pick the right one?
I believe the best therapists are good listeners first of all. The therapist will indicate with her body language and responses that she is paying attention to you and trying to understand your experiences. She may not always get it right the first time, but she will give you the opportunity to correct any misunderstandings. On the other hand, talking to a therapist is not just like talking to a friend. The therapist will have some skills and ideas to offer, and she will help you practice them or put them into place.
The best therapist will be open. He will describe what therapy is like, what he will provide, the cost to you, and what is expected of you before you start. If you have questions or concerns at any time, he will make his best effort to answer you. He will be collaborative and flexible, taking your preferences into consideration as much as possible while still providing therapy that meets the standards of care. If one of you should discover that you are not a good fit for each other, the therapist will attempt to make the transition to another therapist as easy as possible.
The best therapist will also be accepting and non-judgmental. Her job is not to tell you what is right or wrong, only to help you live the most fulfilling life possible for you. She may have to intervene if you are a danger to self or others. Otherwise, if she finds she cannot work with you because of a values conflict, she will discuss it with you and offer to refer you to another therapist.
In my next blog I will discuss your job as a client!